Parks and Rec and Picnic Sex

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It’s been a while, but I started seeing this guy who was absolutely wonderful, and managed to fuck that up. So focusing on fashion to make me feel better since I can’t afford retail therapy. The last plans I made with my ex-guy were to have a cute picnic in a park, now I’m sitting in bed with a bag of Jet Puffed Marshmallows, and a laptop and half a face of shitty rubbed off make up. Winning, fa’sho. Whatever. So point of this is that I did end up using my clothing budget for the week on ….you guessed it Picnic Attire. Cause you know, picnics lead to sex in public and that means you must be wearing something totally adorbs, and possibly panti-less. (that was a joke, not wearing panties in public while wearing a dress/skirt is a terrible idea, don’t ask questions, but trust me)

When going for a picnic outfit I wanted 3 things: cute color, functionality, and obvi a dress. I bought this lovely little biddy at Francesca’s Collections on clearance for $19.98!! While I was there I also got an adorable necklace and scarf to accentuate this outfit. In total I spent around 50, but I’ll be able to reuse the scarf in so many ways it was a wonderful investment.

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Now, the dress was something I fell in love with instantly. the soft yellow SCREAMS summer sunshine and happy park picnic attire, and it’s got a Ballerina Back, which I LOVE. (ballerina back is when the back of the dress scoops down low, revealing subtly sexy shoulder blades and spine). It’s also cut in the way of a mini-fit-n-flare dress, the top cinches at the waist then flairs out ever so softly, which make the dress super fun to spin around in. I got the dress on sale, they didn’t have any additional sizes and the only one left (the one I bought) was a bit big on me. Here’s the thing though, normally this dress would have been $44, I got it for less than half of that!! It’s a cotton dress too so it’ll shrink!! After washing it in warm water, and then drying it in the dryer it fits almost perfectly, the straps are still big though, but that’s the easiest solution, I just cut them close to the middle and tie them to wear they stop falling off my arms!! The important thing to remember is just because it doesn’t fit you perfectly in the store, doesnt mean you cant make it fit you perfectly at home! Reconstructing clothing is the easiest thing to do and it’s fun! Once you do one piece you’ll become addicted, and the greatest part is if you reconstruct it then the piece goes from something that anyone can have in their closet, to something only you have in your closet. In my next post I’ll show you some of my favorite items I’ve made.

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Back to picnic attire. Wear a dress for easy access, but make sure the dress is simple in cut and design and is a soft color like soft pink, yellow, baby blue, or mint. Yes you’re going to have sex in public and you want to look super sexy, but you don’t want to actually look like a girl who would have sex on the fourth graders slide.

 

Luda and Usher said it best. We want a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed.

Enjoy your picnics Belles, hopefully you’ll be having more fun that I am today.

 

Table Manners and Bless my Heart,

B

 

About britaknee

I'm Brittany, I love my bbz (James & Cash) clothes, glitter, mud, glitter, PBR, making stuff, and freedom.
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